Comments on: The Safety Net of Marriage http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/ The Truth About Islam Sat, 17 May 2008 03:27:03 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.3.2 By: A http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-239 A Mon, 10 Mar 2008 15:54:30 +0000 http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-239 Salaam I know this is a couple of months late, but i've only been introduced to this site recently. Anyways replying to "Yaz" - Someone's mentioned already that the whole definition of "arranged marriage the islamic way" has been taken well out of context. I agree with that completely. Personally I don't understand it. I myself have had a fairly strict Islamic upbringing. Which doesn't mean my parents have kept me locked in my house away from the world, no! Infact i've just finished Uni. But all the Shariah rules have been drilled in to my head from day 0... Alhamdulillah. So I thought when it comes to marriage my parents will do everything the Islamic way. I couldn't have been so wrong. (not that i'm married or anything) My brother got married recently and uhum although it was an "arranged" marriage it certainly wasn't within the Shariah rules. However it was certainly within the "Cultural" rules. Parents these day's are under the illusion that it's okay to find the right match for their children and after that let them do what they want... even though the Nikkah ceremony has not been performed.. People say it's important to "get to know" you're spouse really well before you get married. I say, ask a standard person who has been in a (haraam) relationship for a long time, exactly which bit of there time together was the best part?! Most will answer "the first few months" and that'll be because the couple are getting to know each other. Wouldn't you rather have this after marriage? Like my mum say's, "every marriage is a love marriage." and "you learn to love. you don't love a person straight away" Sorry for extra long post. Hope it makes sense (inshaAllah) May Allah SWT help and guide us all in attaining the best of spouses in the most halaal way possible. And keep us steadfast upon his deen always and forever! Aameen!! Salaam

I know this is a couple of months late, but i’ve only been introduced to this site recently.

Anyways replying to “Yaz” -
Someone’s mentioned already that the whole definition of “arranged marriage the islamic way” has been taken well out of context. I agree with that completely.

Personally I don’t understand it.

I myself have had a fairly strict Islamic upbringing. Which doesn’t mean my parents have kept me locked in my house away from the world, no! Infact i’ve just finished Uni. But all the Shariah rules have been drilled in to my head from day 0… Alhamdulillah.

So I thought when it comes to marriage my parents will do everything the Islamic way. I couldn’t have been so wrong. (not that i’m married or anything)

My brother got married recently and uhum although it was an “arranged” marriage it certainly wasn’t within the Shariah rules.
However it was certainly within the “Cultural” rules. Parents these day’s are under the illusion that it’s okay to find the right match for their children and after that let them do what they want… even though the Nikkah ceremony has not been performed..

People say it’s important to “get to know” you’re spouse really well before you get married. I say, ask a standard person who has been in a (haraam) relationship for a long time, exactly which bit of there time together was the best part?! Most will answer “the first few months” and that’ll be because the couple are getting to know each other. Wouldn’t you rather have this after marriage? Like my mum say’s, “every marriage is a love marriage.” and “you learn to love. you don’t love a person straight away”

Sorry for extra long post. Hope it makes sense (inshaAllah)

May Allah SWT help and guide us all in attaining the best of spouses in the most halaal way possible. And keep us steadfast upon his deen always and forever! Aameen!!

]]> By: Yaz http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-184 Yaz Mon, 14 Jan 2008 09:40:50 +0000 http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-184 This topic is very interesting and to an extent 100% true. I agree that marriage lays a foundation of stability in all relationships but this is not always the case. This is all entirely dependent on the couples themselves and how much faith, trust and love they have for each other. You will find couples who have been successfully living with each other for the same time or even longer than married couples!! Like you say this topic works both ways. However I would like to ask for anyone’s opinions on what they think of arranged marriages compared to love marriages. What are your comments on this from both a religious and cultural point of view? This topic is very interesting and to an extent 100% true. I agree that marriage lays a foundation of stability in all relationships but this is not always the case. This is all entirely dependent on the couples themselves and how much faith, trust and love they have for each other. You will find couples who have been successfully living with each other for the same time or even longer than married couples!! Like you say this topic works both ways.

However I would like to ask for anyone’s opinions on what they think of arranged marriages compared to love marriages. What are your comments on this from both a religious and cultural point of view?

]]> By: Z.R http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-183 Z.R Fri, 11 Jan 2008 16:40:41 +0000 http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-183 wots going on with the screen above?? the 1st letter ov all the words on a new line are missing! can sum1 sort it out! It doesnt luk gud! wots going on with the
screen above?? the 1st
letter ov all the words
on a new line are missing!
can sum1 sort it out! It
doesnt luk gud!

]]> By: Z.R http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-182 Z.R Fri, 11 Jan 2008 16:28:09 +0000 http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-182 ok fair enuf, I do get ur point. But not evry1 finks like dat. (init Yaz! do comment!) ok fair enuf, I do get ur point. But not evry1 finks like dat.
(init Yaz! do comment!)

]]> By: Hussain http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-181 Hussain Fri, 11 Jan 2008 11:36:39 +0000 http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-181 Z.R As Muslim's we try to bring as many Sunnats (ways of the Prophet) in to our lives. Marriage is one of many Sunnats and like all Sunnats they are very beneficial. Hopefully if you read the articles posted on this site you will gain an understanding of the importance of marriage. I take your point of the benefits of being single. I was for many years and this gave me a lot of fun in life. However, as this is a sunnat I have firm believe that it will be of benefit to me, my fiancé and with the grace of Allah to mankind. Z.R As Muslim’s we try to bring as many Sunnats (ways of the Prophet) in to our lives. Marriage is one of many Sunnats and like all Sunnats they are very beneficial. Hopefully if you read the articles posted on this site you will gain an understanding of the importance of marriage. I take your point of the benefits of being single. I was for many years and this gave me a lot of fun in life. However, as this is a sunnat I have firm believe that it will be of benefit to me, my fiancé and with the grace of Allah to mankind.

]]> By: Sid http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-175 Sid Mon, 07 Jan 2008 19:23:34 +0000 http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-175 Z - why don't u send me an e-mail through the contact us section and we can discuss it further... Z - why don’t u send me an e-mail through the contact us section and we can discuss it further…

]]> By: Z http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-172 Z Mon, 07 Jan 2008 10:06:17 +0000 http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-172 Hey Sid I wanted to ask u a question… How do I post stories on the blog? Am I not allowed? Is it the moderators (i.e yourself) who can only post stuff on the blog? Do we need special user requirements or something? Hey Sid I wanted to ask u a question…
How do I post stories on the blog? Am I not allowed? Is it the moderators (i.e yourself) who can only post stuff on the blog? Do we need special user requirements or something?

]]> By: Z.R http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-169 Z.R Mon, 07 Jan 2008 09:50:50 +0000 http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-169 Well thanks for all your replies. But I really don’t understand why people make such a big fuss about getting married! Single life is much more better and fun! All you single people out there should know exactly what I mean!! Well thanks for all your replies. But I really don’t understand why people make such a big fuss about getting married! Single life is much more better and fun! All you single people out there should know exactly what I mean!!

]]> By: Hussain http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-168 Hussain Sun, 06 Jan 2008 18:51:06 +0000 http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-168 <p>Z.R I'm the friend Sid's refers too. There are many story's floating around in our small community however to clarify we were introduced by a third party. Moreover, I'd like to say Arranged or Love with the grace of Allah may we have a life together that is both beneficial for us and the deen of Islam<br /> <blockquote>...and in Allah we trust</p></blockquote> <p> Just remember the Hadith<br /> <blockquote>Trust in Allah, but tie up your camel</p></blockquote> <p> I hope the the point is fairly self explanatory.</p> <p>And Allah knows best.</p> Z.R I’m the friend Sid’s refers too. There are many story’s floating around in our small community however to clarify we were introduced by a third party. Moreover, I’d like to say Arranged or Love with the grace of Allah may we have a life together that is both beneficial for us and the deen of Islam

…and in Allah we trust

Just remember the Hadith

Trust in Allah, but tie up your camel

I hope the the point is fairly self explanatory.

And Allah knows best.

]]> By: Sid http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-166 Sid Sat, 05 Jan 2008 17:40:08 +0000 http://www.hidayahblog.com/index.php/2008/01/04/the-safety-net-of-marriage/#comment-166 Well to my understanding it is an arranged marriage... Well to my understanding it is an arranged marriage…

]]>